So, What Do People Come to Talk to You About?

It’s a common question we get. 

We get asked a lot about the kinds of stories we hear when we listen to others. What are the things that people come to you to share? What do they express the most? What are the issues that others are struggling with?

Well, they come to talk about just about everything - heartbreak, loss, pain, anxiety, illness, relationships, guilt, fear, money, religion, work, frustrations, sex, politics, insecurity, aimlessness, uncertainty, anger, depression, divorce, family, decisions, resentments.

And sometimes, there is even joy, laughter, celebration, goodness, and gratitude thrown in the mix!

The whole gamut of human life experiences and emotions are what we hear. 

But mostly they come - if we had to put a larger context to it - because they are lonely and feel disconnected, and because they are grieving what they have lost or have never found in the first place. 

Loneliness. Disconnection. Grief.

The common travails of the human condition summed up, in brief.

In an age when technology, electronic devices, and scores and scores of social platforms are available to us to connect us more than ever before in the history of the world and human civilization, the human condition is one in which we are more relationally, emotionally, and spiritually disconnected than ever before. 

It’s a pandemic-level problem.

Despite this profound problem, we do not despair. We believe beyond a doubt that there is an antidote to the loneliness, disconnection and grief we all witness, hear about, and certainly at times feel. 

We believe that the antidote starts with listening, continues with listening, and ends with listening. 

To one another’s stories. To one another’s experiences. To one another’s  feelings and emotions. With empathy and compassion. With an undivided presence and attention. With respect and a belief that everyone’s story matters and deserves to be heard. 

It is by listening that we learn, that we grow in understanding and insight, and that we can come to the place where it’s much easier to love one another because we know their stories.

That’s why we listen - to model the way for loneliness to be diminished, for human connections to deepen and grow, and for grief at what’s been lost, or never even been found, to find comfort and reassurance that we are not all alone.

Last week, three of our leaders took part in the International Listening Association's 46th annual convention, at the University of Maryland, in College Park, Maryland, in the United States. We were privileged to be selected to make two presentations - one, a listening training, featuring our steps to better listening, focusing on two of them in particular, starting with a belief and creating the (safe) space for others to be heard, and the second, performing highlights from the play I’m Proud of You that we co-produced this past spring with Open Stage, a Harrisburg, Pennsylvania theater company. 

Being with a group of people who professionally are involved in one way or another in the art and science of listening - and who believe in listening’s  transformative power, by teaching, researching, and practicing listening - inspires us to keep striving to show the world what listening can do to heal our relationships, to lessen our loneliness, to increase our connections, and to comfort our grief, was profound. To know that we are not alone in this work gives us greater hope and ongoing encouragement to keep our mission alive, growing, and strong.

We know the answer that can transform lives. It starts, continues, and ends with listening. It’s a powerful force when we use it. We see that force at work every single day. 

Over the next few weeks, we will dive into what we hear from others in greater depth and specificity. We hope you’ll follow along as we share how listening truly does transform hearts, minds, and lives. 

Photo by Christina @ wocintechchat.com on Unsplash