Both Sides Now

I've looked at life from both sides now,

from win and lose and still somehow,

it's life's illusions I recall.

I really don't know life at all.

Both Sides Now, by Joni Mitchell

There are so many aspects of life that we all can feel caught in the middle of, between equally pressing concerns and needs. We see those concerns and needs from both sides, and we’re often torn apart as we attempt to meet the needs of both. 

Continuing the sentiments of Both Sides Now, from our last blog, today we want to look at the ways that so many of us can be overwhelmed, feeling the crunch of juggling so much for so many for so long.

What is it that you feel caught between, conflicted about how to respond to all the sides of life’s challenges?

Do you feel caught between the demands of your professional life and your personal life?

Do you feel caught between nurturing your connections and relationships with your family members and also with your friends and community relationships?

Do you feel caught between your political, religious, or social values and the differing values of your family, friends, and colleagues and the relationships you want to nurture with them?

Do you feel caught between nurturing your own sense of self, fulfillment, and being who you really are and the needs and expectations from others and the community and culture around you, whatever those expectations might be?

Do you feel caught between the needs of your parents as they are aging and the needs of your children as they continue to grow, develop, and become the adults you hope for them to be?

We know that there are so many other ways in which we can feel caught between and overwhelmed, as well. We want to honor and respect all sides of our relationships. But it’s rarely easy, often complicated, and usually accompanied by guilt, anxieties, and frustration.

Juggling work and home lives can be incredibly demanding and stressful.

Many cultural expectations can weigh on us and cause incredible conflict among and within us. Across the globe, divisive and contentious political, religious, and social values cause great disconnection and strife among us.

Finding time to recharge our own spirits and still meet the needs of the people and things we cherish can fill us with tremendous resentment and burn-out. Navigating the responsibilities between the generations, for our parents and for our children, can be a major point of conflicted feelings and fatigue for many who are between those two familial generations, and trying to meet the needs of both.

In fact, this generational stress point is one area of feeling caught between that several of Someone To Tell It To’s team members are feeling right now. Culturally, that position is popularly termed the “Sandwich Generation” - the position of being  “sandwiched” in between the other two, draining their attention, energy, and time. It’s one that many people with children to care for and parents who are aging will be confronted with at an often inevitable time in their lives.

What we want you to know is this: 

Someone To Tell It To’s listeners are skilled at listening to all the feelings of being caught between. With empathy, compassion, non-judgment, intentionality, genuineness, and not telling anyone what they must do, we accompany people as they sort out those feelings and challenges. We help you to discover what is best for you to do with those feelings and challenges. We enable you to give voice to them, safely, and to find the solutions to mitigating them and successfully and healthily finding solutions to them.

Whatever the feelings, whatever the challenges, might be.

And maybe, as you look at both sides, all the sides involved, you’ll come to realize that you might know and understand life quite a lot more than you ever thought you could.

Photo by Kaspars Eglitis on Unsplash